TORRO GRILL

     Type: Steakhouse
     Address: Lesnaya ul., 5B
     Phone: 921-0488
     Web: www.torrogrill.ru

     Belorusskaya

     Price: 1000 rub p/p

     Shit-o-meter: -0.5 stars

First I would like to congratulate the owner of Torro Grill with his almost perfect application of price-quality-atmosphere. Bravo.

The restaurant is located in a new business complex at Belorusskaya called White Square. It’s a really modern, clean kinda place. In fact, the whole complex has an eerie aura to it, especially the view from the (huge!) restaurant windows. For some reason I feel as if I’m in London. And that’s not even taking into account the swarm of expats clogging the bar. Ugh. However, when I look at my watch and see that it’s 9pm and this place is STILL OPEN, I realize that can’t be the case. Then when I see my half-empty packet of smokes lying on the table, I breath a (wheezy) sigh of relief.

Frankly I’m impressed by the atmosphere here, almost as much as I’m impressed by the price of a beer (130 rub). Scanning the menu, I can see that the prices are also very reasonable! Burger is 450 rubles and that’s NOT the price per 100 grams!

“Chyo blya?” you ask?

Could this restaurant tick all the right boxes?

Answer: “Chyo blya? - Of course not!”

I don’t think I was born with a particularly large mouth. I think my mouth is quite average, even compared to the average Russian mouth. I was therefore a little disappointed when I took the second bite of my burger… because it was also the last bite. It was a fairly tasty burger, so I tried regurgitating it. Perhaps I could fool my stomach into thinking I’d eaten a decent amount of food. But my girlfriend forced me to abandon that plan (she could never get the hang of the Heimlich maneuver...) - Right: Am I asking for too much???

I’ve been back twice since then. One time we took the meat platter for 4 people (and no, I didn’t order that for myself—there were actually 4 of us). It was rather filling (the 2 girls are on a diet), but I would rate it 5/10 in terms of taste.

I can however heartily recommend the Bruschetta and the French Fries with Truffle Oil (don’t ask me what the Truffle Oil is—I think they use invisible Truffle Oil…). There are also a couple of really cheap sandwiches which could be worth trying. Though judging by the size of my burger, they could be no more than 5 crumbs of bread...(Right: Girls - forget going to sushi restaurants! Eat at Torro Grill every day!)

Overall, it’s a really good place! There’s also the possibility of sitting by the bar and having a few drinks—so it’s versatile too. Unfortunately when PwC moves into their new office upstairs over the next few weeks, I can see this place getting really busy and therefore losing its quality. Let’s see.

PS: This seems to be fast turning into the new Scandinavia in terms of the expat crowd. Seems that some of the classic expats are become a little more risqué in their ventures. Dear Owner, if there’s something you can do to prevent this, please take action immediately.

Further update: Have been coming here regularly for drinks and cigars. The barmen know my girlfriend, and even give her free drinks (and don't act disappointed when they see she's with me). Have really been enjoying Torro recently, but have not eaten here in a long time. Stay tuned for a food review soon.